Hello, Spamburger's the name. Have a good gander at my loveliness.
Currently, I am serving a sentence at the Bad Meats Correctional Facility for multiple burglar-- I mean burgery.
But hush. Don't tell my momma that. She still thinks I won "Mystery Meat of the Year" and am touring Lollywood with Mint Eastwood, Brad Pitta bread, and Gwyneth Poultry on a charity campaign.